Estate Planning: Conversations for the Holiday Table

During the holiday season, families often come together to share meals, stories, and cherished traditions. It's a time of warmth and connection, where generations gather in one place. Amidst this emotional richness, the holidays also present a unique opportunity to talk about the future – particularly estate planning.

While discussing estate planning can be uncomfortable, it offers significant peace of mind. Imagine knowing that your loved ones can avoid legal disputes and confusion because you've taken the time to prepare.

Questions for the Conversation

Here are some important questions to consider during these gatherings, allowing both generations to express their wishes:

Questions adult children can ask their parents:

• Do you have an up-to-date will or trust in place?
• Who have you chosen to make financial and medical decisions if you’re unable to?
• Have you shared your wishes for medical care and end-of-life planning?
• If something happened tomorrow, would we know where to find your important documents and accounts?
• Are there heirlooms or traditions you’d like us to know the stories behind?
• Do you feel confident that the people you’ve chosen to handle your affairs are still the right ones?

Questions parents can ask their adult children:

• Do you know where to find my important documents in case of an emergency?
• Have you considered creating your own will or an estate plan?
• If you received an inheritance tomorrow, would you know what to do with it or who to turn to for help?
• Are there family keepsakes or traditions you’d be heartbroken not to have carried forward?
• If you had to step in to help us – financially or medically – what support would you need?

Approaching the Discussion

Introduce these topics during a quiet moment or a walk, rather than over the main meal, to avoid turning it into a formal meeting. This subtle approach ensures clarity and calmness in the conversation.

Remember, estate planning isn’t just about wealth. It’s a way to have control over your affairs, provide clarity to your loved ones, ensure care for dependents, and pass on your values and traditions.

The Benefits of Discussing Estate Planning

For adult children, understanding their parents' estate plan can prevent painful surprises and ensure swift decision-making when needed. For parents, it's an opportunity to prepare the younger generation and open discussions about continuing family legacies.

Framing estate planning as a gift makes the conversation easier: it’s not about money, it’s about caring for the people you love most and removing future burdens from them. The holidays — when multiple generations are together — are the natural time to begin.

If you feel unsure about how to start this conversation or need guidance, consider reaching out to a trusted advisor who can help navigate these discussions.